I haven’t edited my novel in four days. I didn’t intentionally mean for it to fall by the wayside, but in all truth I haven’t really done any form of writing activity in this time. I started reading a book. Yesterday I even managed to scribble a few notes down on a short story that needs some significant changes. I have happily ignored any schedule or intent linked to my novel, and I realise that I don’t feel guilty at all.
I’ve been ill. Not so ill that I probably couldn’t have worked on it in short bursts, but the generally unwell feeling I’ve been experiencing has given me a suitable excuse not to bother even attempting to edit. No one is going to notice if I haven’t written or edited any words today. Equally though, there is no one I can delegate the work to in my absence. In short, the work just won’t get done.
And you know what? That’s okay.
The only deadline I’m working to is my own. The only one really wanting to get this story out there is me, and I’m not willing to trade in my health, my social life or my down time to make that happen. In the past I might have, but not today.
The novel will be finished when it’s finished. As tautological as that may seem, it has the gleam of truth to it. I can try to rush, I can put pressure on myself, I can work as hard as I possibly can…or I can take my time, relax a little, accept that the process takes time and take things at my own pace, rather than try and enforce one to meet an arbitrary deadline.
So I’m taking a break. Giving myself permission to take a step back. Maybe if I can lose the sense of duty I have applied so recently to the edits I will rediscover a deeper need to enjoy the process rather than labour over it.
Not just the novel, but the blog too. It’s all become a little overwhelming. I have plenty of time to dedicate to all these things – writing, editing, blogging – but right now I’m struggling to feel the joy that comes with it. I’m not viewing any of the hurdles currently overcome as achievements either. I’ve lost my zeal, and I think I just need time for it to rebuild.
So, certainly from the blog, I’m taking the week off. No more posts until September. Annoyingly, the only thing keeping me going the last couple of weeks have been my blog stats: I’ve already had a record-breaking month (most views in any month and highest average per day since I started), so I can afford the dip in viewings. It will perhaps be a relief not to have to check them all week!
Anyway, I’ll see you all in a week or so. Happy writings, Good Luck editing and all the best with life in general. 🙂
See you soon. x