The Importance Of Dreams
For a long time all I wanted to be was a writer. I love writing; making up fictional worlds that contain complex characters and moral dilemmas is my escape from the hustle of everyday life. Once, my dream was simply to write a novel; then it was to edit that novel; then get that novel an agent.
I’ve had smaller dreams in between; about writing short stories, being published, and getting a 5* review. Each time one of these mini-dreams have come true – not by accident, or luck, or magic – it has been because I made them happen. I made a conscious choice to aim high, and somehow it all worked out better than I expected!
Of course, as I conquered the smaller dreams, my imagination created new ones, bigger, bolder, braver ones. Dreams I never quite believed could happen to me. As was the case with this latest one: to leave my Museum job (even though I loved the work) and dedicate my life to writing my own fiction, and helping other writers achieve their own dream of writing ‘that’ novel!
Time to Choose the Dream
I’ve secretly known I would love to be a writing coach for a while now. I get such a buzz seeing other writers commit to and achieve their dreams, and it’s been so rewarding when I’ve played even a small part in their success. For over a decade I’ve facilitated learning in my Museum role, and translating the skills to nurture new writers to build their confidence and develop their craft to actually write their novel is an easy parallel.
During the Coronavirus lockdown, being forced to work from home my health was so much more improved. My M.E. and Fibromyalgia became background noise I barely noticed. I honestly never quite dare hope that I could live my life without the constant crushing fatigue and pain. Those things are gone now, and it made me realise that I was compromising my health for a job. Granted, it was a job I loved doing, but when the opportunity arose to apply for voluntary severance I had a choice: continue on in a job I enjoyed but continue in crippling pain; or forge a new path in a role I dreamed of, being able to live a relatively healthy life…
Put like that, it didn’t seem like such a difficult decision.
Dealing with The Fear
Of course that didn’t automatically cancel out the fear. Will it turn out to be a mistake? Will I be able to make it as a writer and a writing coach and create a career that will sustain my way of life? What if no agent will take on my novel/s? So many questions, so many potential fears. But, being a writer has taught me many many lessons already:
- If you never put the words on the page, nothing will ever get written
- You make a mistake in the draft; you can fix it in the edit
- Characters who take the risks, reap the rewards
- Difficult challenges teach characters the lessons they need to end the story well
These are the things I’ve kept in my mind as my fears arise. And like my Idea Generator method* of plotting out numerous stories before choosing one for the novel, I am viewing this path as one of many. There is no ONE right decision. There are many decisions, all of which have differing outcomes. As such I can’t say I’ll ever think I made the ‘wrong’ choice; because I don’t believe there is one.
Being Confident about my Choice
Of all the options I followed in my imagination as to what could happen if I made various decisions at this point in my life, the one where I stood up to claim my dream and invest in it was the one I knew I would regret if I didn’t follow it. There are people in my life who whole-heartedly support me, and others who don’t quite understand the ‘risk’ I am taking. The main thing is though: I believe. I believe in my ability to make this dream a reality.
So whatever happens in my drive to be the writer I want to be, and to support other writers to live their own dream, I am confident I will be able to take on the challenge. Following my dream is the brave, bold decision I am happy to make – no matter what happens next.
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